stylinsmut:

im a hostess at a restaurant and my favorite thing to do is ask 14/15 year old boys who are out on dates if they want a kids menu 

milkshake-for-delia:

we all have that friend who is really motivated about work and life and always has relationships and excerises and gets good grades and makes you feel like

get-back-to-hogwarts:

I sometimes feel offended by American stereotypes, but then I remember that we had a nationwide panic when they stopped making Twinkies. 

fearfullymade-locs:

thedameloves:

homeisaheartbeat:

What are your top beauty tips?

Start out perfect and don’t change a thing. Always accentuate your best features by pointing at them. And conceal your flaws by sucker punching anyone who has the audacity to mention them.

Never too old to learn from the Muppets.

And this:

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.” - Miss Piggy

metatheatre:

cheesoisuncool:

theres no difference between exercise and black magic both of them hurt your body at first and drain you of energy but the more you dabble in it the more powerful you become

#wake up america